Sunday, August 31, 2008

A Life to Be

Lately, I've been thinking, where am I today? I'm thinking of the big world... Did I reached that far or am I still starting with my life? There are many questions that are in my mind that wants to be answered...Where does this world leads me and what would life be? Hay, lots of questions still unanswered but someday I will tell myself I'm already fulfilled completely. When that time comes, I will be the very happy person in this world.. But of course above everything else always put my trust and faith in God. For he alone can help me reach my destiny.


I've been guilty lately. I never checked or used this blog for some time. I was focused with my other blog. But then, I got a chance today, because I managed to get three days off from work...hehehe.. I felt my blog was neglected from it's owner. Anyways, hope I can make out of my three days off..


The life I seek must be fast
The speed of life makes me laugh!
Death's just around the corner for
a Queer like me!
Well so they say all of them Freaks.
Homophobia I really do detest
What I am is what I do best!
Like if you want, Answer! This ain't no test
If you like me, "Great," then we're friends
If you hate me don't make me get upset!
I'm just a Dike whom nobody Straight likes
Well forget you all, cause we love each other
my Baby and I!
You don't have to shake my hand,
I'm not asking you to stare.
If you don't like what you see,
then get the Hell out of here!
I am what I am, So please understand
Even if you don't "Who really gives a damn?"


Have you ever felt, the cold and lifeless hand of an infant, gazed into their unblinking eyes, and observed the face of death, when masked in bittersweet innocence?

Have you ever touched your dreams, and felt the simplistic joy, of feeling them become reality, only to abandon them, for reasons you cannot explain?

Have you ever watched your family, who once shared the greatest of loves, suffer an unforgettable and unforgivable tragedy, that will slowly, painfully, and inevitably, tear them all apart?

Do you know, firsthand, the evil that resides deep within the heart of every man, every woman, and every child? Have you seen its face as it randomly seeks, a soul to torment and destroy?

Do you know the darker side of life, the one that awakens you, in the still of the night, crying to the unknowable God's, ‘Save me from myself. '?

Does your heart constantly question, whether humanity is obtainable, in a world corrupted with suffering, and where war, is the favoured solution for peace?

If you really want to know me, and understand the forces that compel me to move on, then take these questions, and take this pain, for this who I am.

Monday, August 18, 2008


Miriam Defensor Santiago was featured in Correspondents last week.

Maganda rin naman ang naidudulot ng pagiging prangka ni Senador Miriam Defensor-Santiago. Ayon kay Santiago, marami ang tumatak-bong Senador dahil sa laki ng budget na ibinibigay sa kanila kada buwan.

Lumalabas na P35,000 suweldo nila kada buwan ay pakitang-tao lang sa milyun-milyong budget ng bawat senador. Kada buwan ay may Fixed Monthly Budget ang bawat Senador ng humigit-kumulang P2 Milyon.

Sa opisina pa lang nila ay humigit-kumulang P500,000 ang budget nila sa Maintenance and Operating Expenses (Rental, Utilities, Supplies at Domestic Travels) at P500,000 para sa Staff at Personal expenses. Kaya para makatipid ang ibang Senador, kaunti lang ang staff na kinukuha nila. Nagtataka ka pa kung bakit mayroong mga Ghost Employee?

Bukod diyan, may P760,000 allowance pa sila kada buwan para naman sa Foreign Travel. At ang masakit pa nito, hindi na kailngan i-liquidate ang mga resibo ng mga gastusin 'yan kundi Certification lang ang Requirement.

Heto pa, lahat sila ay Chairman ng mg Komite sa Senado. Ang Committee Chairman ay tumatanggap din ng budget na sinlaki ng tinatanggap ng mga Senador na humigit-kumulang P1 Milyon din! Hindi sila mawawalan ng Komite dahil 24 lang ang ating mga Senador at 37 naman ang Committee sa Senado. There's food for everybody 'ika nga! Lumalabas na doble ang kanilang benepesiyo at kita kapag sila ay nabiyayaan ng Committee Chairmanship.

Sa P200 milyon na Budget para sa Pork Barrel ng mga Senador bawat taon, awtomatikong may 10% na S.O.P. o kita ng Senador na P20 milyon. Ito ang porsiyento na ibinibigay ng mga kontratista sa mga Senador na nagbibigay sa kanila ng mga Infrastructure at Livelihood Project.

Bago matapos ang termino ng isang Senador, kumita na siya ng P100 milyon sa Pork Barrel pa lang. Yung ibang Senador mas gahaman, hindi lang 10% kundi 20 - 30% ang komisyon hinihingi sa mga kontratista.

Pansinin niyo na lang ang pagbabago ng buhay ng ilan sa ating mga Senador simula nang manungkulan sa puwesto. Kung dati ay simple lang ang kanilang pamumuhay ngayon ay nakatira na sila sa mga eksklusibong subdivision, maraming bahay sa Pilipinas at abroad at mahigit lima ang sasakyan.

Ngayon nagtataka ka pa ba kung bakit gumagastos ng daan-daang milyong piso ang mga Senador sa kampanya para sa isang posisyon na P35,000 lang ang suweldo kada buwan? Bawing-bawi pala ang gastos kapag naupo na!

Thursday, August 14, 2008

A Dark and Stormy Night ...

A Dark and Stormy Night ...

They were together in the house.
Just the two of them.
It was a cold, dark, stormy night.
The storm had some quickly and each time the thunder boomed he watched her jump.
She looked across the room and admired his strong appearance ... and wished that he would take her in his arms, protect her from the storm.

Suddenly, with a pop, the power went out...
She screamed...
He raced to the sofa where she was cowering.
He didn't hesitate to pull her into his arms.
He knew this was a forbidden union and expected her to pull back.
He was surprised when she didn't resist but instead clung to him.
The storm raged on ...

They knew it was wrong ...

Their families would never understand ...

So consumed were they in their FEAR that they heard no opening of doors ... just the faint click of a camera ...

Friday, August 8, 2008


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Saturday, August 2, 2008

god's boxes

I have in my hands two boxes
Which God gave me to hold.
He said, "Put all your sorrows in the black,
And all your joys in the gold."

I heeded His words, and in the two boxes
Both my joys and sorrows I store,
But though the gold became heavier each day
The black was as light as before.

With curiosity, I opened the black
I wanted to find out why
And I saw, in the base of the box, a hole
Which my sorrows had fallen out by.

I showed the hole to God, and mused aloud,
"I wonder where my sorrows could be."
He smiled a gentle smile at me.
"My child, they're all here with me."

I asked, "God, why give me the boxes,
Why the gold, and the black with the hole?"
"My child, the gold is for you to count your blessings,
the black is for you to let go."


Go placidly amid the noise and haste,
and remember what peace there may be in silence.
As far as possible, without surrender,
be on good terms with all persons.

Speak your truth quietly and clearly;
and listen to others,
even to the dull and ignorant;
they too have their story.

Avoid loud and aggressive persons;
they are vexations to the spirit.

If you compare yourself with others,
you may become vain or bitter,
for always there will be greater
and lesser persons than yourself.

Enjoy your achievements as well as your plans.
Keep interested in your own career, however humble,
it's a real possession in the changing fortunes of time.

Exercise caution in your business affairs,
for the world is full of trickery.
But let this not blind you to what virtue there is;
many persons strive for high ideals,
and everywhere life is full of heroism.

Be yourself.
Especially do not feign affection.
Neither be cynical about love;
for in the face of all aridity and disenchantment,
it is as perennial as the grass.

Take kindly the counsel of the years,
gracefully surrendering the things of youth.

Nurture strength of spirit
to shield you in sudden misfortune.
But do not distress yourself with dark imaginings.
Many fears are born of fatigue and loneliness.

Beyond a wholesome discipline,
be gentle with yourself.

You are a child of the universe
no less than the trees and the stars;
you have a right to be here.
And whether or not it is clear to you,
no doubt the universe is unfolding as it should.

Therefore be at peace with God,
whatever you conceive him to be.
And whatever your labors and aspirations,
in the noisy confusion of life,
keep peace in your soul.

With all its sham, drudgery and broken dreams,
it is still a beautiful world.
Be cheerful.
Strive to be happy.